The Day I interviewed

There are always "these days". Days that have dates that I think to myself – “Oh boy, I’ll remember this date for sure ... what a turning point!”.

I can’t give you any examples, because of course – I’m just kidding myself when I say these things, its rare that a date is actually remembered. This blog is neat, it hopefully will remember dates for me.

Transitions are like this. Everyone tells you that a transition will happen, that it will be hard, that it will have characteristics X, Y, and Z. Before the transition you believe that you will be prepared for it, and believe it will occur. During the transition you scorn advice givers and sulk in your rut of difficulties. After the transition you have learned your own lessons and understand to some extant the experiences others must have had when giving you their advice. If the conclusion to this paragraph was simply “you have to live something to truly get through, past, over, or beyond it” then this paragraphs conclusion would be lame, cliché, and void of substance. To avoid this dilemma, the paragraph will instead end quite abruptly.

So as a part of my “Transition Blues” as they were so eloquently called, I decided I had no talents. I decided I wouldn’t learn Chinese, wouldn’t use it, didn’t understand economics, and that I only had hot air, charisma, and pretty rhetoric to cover up a big vacuum of person and trick others into thinking I had merits. I was pretty low self-esteem compared to my usually bloated head. An interview this evening was helpful. My biggest complaint was a lack of tangible skills and assets. I wanted to know numbers, program computers, and speak languages. I may make some improvements on these fronts, but even if these are not my forte, I think I am not for naught. It is possible that I am good and problem solving and understanding process. I think by way of analogy and at times can increase efficiency and efficacy. These are not in my mind “tangible skills” but they are certainly of merit.

I like having discovered this about me. It seems to be the sort of thing that simply need to be discovered. And so, with the help of a blog, may 2/17/09 be known as the day I interviewed.